


Pregnant Lines and Tributary Tears

by FishPrincess



Series: HSWC 2014 Bonus Round 7 [1]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/M, Language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-26
Updated: 2014-12-26
Packaged: 2018-03-03 17:45:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 497
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2859497
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FishPrincess/pseuds/FishPrincess
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jade keeps interrupting Dave's livestreams. For HSWC Bonus Round 7. A written companion to a work by Dreamwidth user mustachioedoctopus.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pregnant Lines and Tributary Tears

**Author's Note:**

  * For [mustachioedoctopus](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mustachioedoctopus/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Unknown](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/89336) by mustachioedoctopus. 



Dave never gets riled up like this. The two of them have been together long enough for Jade to know that this reaction is nothing to be concerned over. After a childhood and adolescence of constantly internalizing his own emotions, he is finally starting to express himself in healthy ways around her – and only her. She knows the difference between his genuine frustration and this playful yelling.

Besides, when Dave is doing one of his SBAHJ drawing streams, Jade can’t help but make an appearance. If the screen is taken up by Microsoft Paint, then the only way for her to contribute is through her voice. With the desktop computer in the bedroom they share, Jade happens to already be reading in there when Dave begins streaming.

Dave talks to his audience in his cool kid voice: the same one that he uses with everyone else during the majority of the time.

“All right, so these douchebags are fucking shit up twenty-four seven. You want to know the genius behind this, you want to know the secret behind the fingers that delicately grope the mouse to churn out love juice in the shape of this masterpiece? This is how it’s done. Check out those lines, motherfuckers. Those curvy, pregnant lines ripe with possibility. You can smell that shit from home, I bet.”

Jade snorts, giggling. “Did you just say pregnant lines?”

“I just said pregnant lines,” he repeats into the computer’s microphone. “I don’t know if you can hear this, but my girlfriend is ragging on my hella verbose manner of speaking. I think a shiny, salty tear fresh from the ocean just slipped out of my eye right now. Traveled down my cheek like a fucking tributary, no doubt about it.”

Now completely distracted from her book, Jade sets it down and glances over at him with a smile. “Dave.”

“Just call these sweet cheeks the river of Dave, because that’s where all of this is going.”

She tries again. “Dave.”

He doesn’t seem to be hearing her.  
“Better equip yourself with a paddle or else you’re headed straight to-“

“DAVE!”

Dave startles, jumping and letting out a yelp that makes Jade raise an eyebrow in concern. Once she realizes he’s all right, she lets herself collapse on the bed, rolling around in fits of laughter.

Dave straightens his headphones on his ears and clears his throat, voice raising in a manner that is more surprised than angry, but it’s still hilarious.

“I am going to plunge a sword into our bed and officially end our 40 year marriage if you do not stop yelling while I am recording my streams!”

The pitch his voice reaches as he speaks only makes her laugh harder, and it isn’t until the end of the stream that she finally halts. She offers her apologies in a kiss before flopping back down on the bed and laughing again. Dave eventually resigns, crawling next to her.

And soon, he’s laughing, too.


End file.
